- MILAN K SINHA
Committing mistakes or even blunder is not abnormal in human life. It's not unusual to realize the same and then repent for the wrongdoings either. It also happens many a times that we take a lesson from the whole thing and also take a firm resolve not to repeat the same mistake again in future, to finally move forward in the course of life's journey with a positive note.
In this way, some of us do try to follow the best principles governing the life of all better people including the great men across the globe.
Nevertheless, if we look around to observe what majority of us are actually doing in this respect, it is found to our dismay that committing mistakes and repenting thereafter goes on parallel track again and again despite a firm resolve at times and in spite of undergoing some punishments too.
It is found that this group of people are found to follow predominantly either of these two behaviour patterns in their day to day life - i) Submissive and ii) Aggressive.
These set of people either do not know when to speak, what to speak or when it is far better to simply keep shut. Usually, they keep on speaking without thinking. They either fail to take a firm stand or do take a stand but fail to present their point of view logically and calmly on any issue. This is visibly reflected in their interaction and working style almost everywhere including the place where they are working.
Interestingly, both submissive and aggressive persons are opposite in nature and normally suffer from inferiority and superiority complex respectively which lead them to have fatal diseases like blood pressure, hypertension, diabetes, kidney problems, to name a few.
Persons having submissive behaviour pattern are of 'Yes Sir' kind. They are ready to say 'yes sir' to their bosses for any good or bad thing, no matter they might spend sleepless nights afterwards or pay a heavy price for this afterwards.
On the other hand, aggressive persons always try to dictate their terms and behave in 'Hiring-Firing' mode. Obviously, this set of people dislike persons who are straight forward, analytical, unbiased and objective. By natural choice, they like submissive people the most and hence keep themselves surrounded by such yes-men.
To say the least, these two sets of people commit mistakes after mistakes, and then repent at times. Notwithstanding, they try to put the blame conveniently on their subordinates and on circumstantial problems. But, truth being otherwise, keeps on chasing them to ultimately result in self-created disproportionate stress and related health issues.
So, in order to ensure a normal happy life, it is desirable to be assertive instead of being submissive or aggressive in one’s behaviour as being assertive is nothing but being communicative, confident, mature, frank, balanced, decisive, empathetic, objective, competent, humorous, relaxed and logical. And undoubtedly, all these positive traits in one's personality do guarantee a better living in any situation anywhere across the world.
Before signing off tonight, let us enjoy what Sharon Anthony Bower says in these lines: The basic difference between being assertive and being aggressive is how our words and behaviour affect the rights and well-being of others.
As always, I am keen to know what you think on this subject. Hence, request you to post Comments to share your views and experiences.
Will meet again with Open Mind. All The Best.
# Published in Patna Daily